Among the concerns of Paul was the "last minute" and he feared the "crows the last hour." How much damage had been done over the centuries, these false zealots of the Good, the reputation of honest atheists. Even at the end would come his bed, of course. He had, he, as the supreme shame, bred and of the priests among its high school students Realpolia classic? Children already marked with deep furrows in the "flesh of the soul", a long-running familistic imprinting. Young sunk, he said bitterly. His pedagogy bounced helplessly against armor conditioning refractory to any pressure of reality, truth, decency. God would clear the painful mystery of so much suffering scattered throughout the world, would make it acceptable, after a long delay of the light illuminating, even the absolute scandal of the torture of the innocent, those babies who claimed Jesus for his salvation and the Word of God, that their supersadico god, let bestiality stupratrice and tortured homo necans done "in His image and likeness." Yes, it happened again, old and well stocked with ailments, warm up on this "scandal infinite": the daily slaughter of children and believing in spite. And he was not allowed another to the best of havoc answers that the shabby pseudo-arguments of the Levite of Coelho.
The three cases involving young people were embodied in three very different from one another, yet united in the "unfortunate choice" (Paul's word) to serve the Great Lie. The youngest was a burly young man "born priest? as Paul said to him, joking, in moments of relaxation. What absolute force pushing an only child, opposed by the parents, that they would like their grandchildren rather than sermons and communion wafers? to be so certain? In fact, the mother, who had risked losing it in a troubled pregnancy, had promised to gud that it would not oppose if the boy was born and lived normal, a possible "call from heaven." Therefore, his objection was a recitation of false solidarity with her husband, who wanted to marry and parent. But the priests of Catholic Action had worked well, and a pliable material natively. Or that he told his mother that some school friends the pitfalls, but in vain because "Jesus was stronger than them"? And Paul is a bit 'he smiled, a little' one gnawing. This student refused any discussion, was devoid of any provision of a dialogue, and closed in the defense rougher: The reversal pure and simple, so senseless, the objections of others. Including, but so trenchant, his philosophy professor. Meditated, Paul, on "ways of the Lord" as they are unpredictable and tortuous, sometimes. In this case, were the failed pregnancies earlier that even troubled birth.
The second case was a sharp dialectical brain reacted to the pins of the professor, and eventually reversed the charges with the old argument that no one has the absolute truth (an adjective repellent Paul). It took refuge in the formulation paradoxical considered highly effective, "ours is a desperate hope." Bum. The shot had pretensions to noble ancestry, not suffered the fate of the champion by the name of the paradox of Kierkegaard Severino? It certainly is comforting also to early impudence of Tertullian: the most sophisticated of late sbracata rival, the handsome Volume trumpeting a "credo quia absurdum" that cut any possibility of honest discourse. E when Paul reminded him that strange breed of "saint" was one who walked away from his brothers in Christ rough performances with this shimmering Pagan topic: "Be patient!'ll show more appetizing when you can enjoy the paradise of the damned tormented by diavoili."
The third was even more angry to Paul, was a kind of carnal angel: blonde, blue eyes, wavy hair, slim figure but solid stature higher than average: a real treat for the young girls in her high school classes and other that it does not really ignored (indeed, as a colleague said in Latin, "if it licked with eyes"). He, too, still in the 'mad about it, "insensitive to the arts seducer accaldate of the girls, fluttering in vain among banks and gyms. He had had as students in the three years of grammar school, the first and third (now both pastors, not a few years), for the second two (which now holds an important position in the Vatican). No wonder, however, for a fourth case, a gentle son, unable to conceive of violence, who discovered his vocation after graduating in natural sciences. Does the pastor, but his gentleness gives some problems to the local bishop's pragmatic spirit. But has little choice: the vocations crisis is an increasingly critical for the Holy Mother of many hypocrisies and some good pragmatic quota. In the face of huge gatherings under the windows The Pope and the various event of the Pope boys.
Let me be clear that Paul would not deter these guys from their faith and vocation: he wanted answers not only crude, a possible the most daring burning in the flames of many, too many liturgical evidence contrary to the misinformation, the horrors of the Bible, the greedy, in most horrible and criminal history of the real Church.
* Another chapter in the succession of improbable gratified Paul was nominated senator in the year of Khaimah. The resounding victory of the flood-destroyed the monster stramiliardario Sicania with an incredible (including the ridiculous) bite of all senatorial seats available in the majority. Paul had always rifutato nominations, but had been treated before then, only local elections, municipal or provincial. Now the youth of the International Revolutionary Party (PRI) in his country (mostly his former students at the Liceo Classico realpoliese) had made his name to a young member of their national (formerly the second term), which was looking for a representative of the so-called civil society able to direct votes on his nomination and thus improve the local situation of the Party, not exactly brilliant. Paul found it a bit 'weird: at that age, not far from the seventies (in fact, very close!) Submitted in an election campaign without a realistic chance of "victory" (a few seats to wrest Khaimah) for the small party that would submit! How else to define this challenge out of time "(as he put it)? Weird as it may, nevertheless had a strong temptation: he had always wanted him, an opportunity like that? He did not, even in his diaries, lamented the lack of political militancy "exposed" in the varied seasons of his social life? I miss him, he would say, the experience of the rallies, the comparison with the crowd, the greatest challenge to my tendency to shy introverted person. And envied friends and colleagues who had had the experience: both local competitions and for those he had always refused. Actually, a couple were even regional, and they had landed only one case of success: with her pleasure, for the political line of his colleague, the late Communist Party. It is a wish for a clear estimate of Paul honesty and consistency, intelligent cultural background, passion "human" well-rooted. He taught his own subjects, in one of the sections of the same grammar school, in the lively town of GIART, not far from the eastern Ionic, full of beautiful beaches. Confirmed by the party, he made two comprehensive regional legislatures, and after two sindacature almost complete in his city. Which did not escape the fate of the majority community "Southerners", almost all due infested cancer combined tripunte mafia-political-Catholic world "deviant" (or little attention to the snares of Satan). All the more valuable, therefore, the double victory of fellow supported by a clear majority of the left. I told the mayor Tolano, the various difficulties he faced. A t the end, his honesty was defeated by the usual transhumance from one party to another sample of the small transformer business. Usually, the direction of travel leading to the caravanserai of Kaiman, greedy off fees, and preparation of various substances, for devotees of the shrine and its faithful servants perinde ac cadaver. There was one among them, leading loyalty set in the fateful last: cherish. Well. Now dreamed of the opportunity presented itself to Paul. And in its most dignified: the noble Senate nomination: how to drop it? And do not let it fall. He denounced, in good faith, the personal difficulties that could have its limits, and he accepted. Almost certain defeat, but peaceful for the caliber of the company would have been a success even defeat a multiplier of votes. And we could cross off the "almost" a residue of consistency in respect of the improbable, unique castle of the divine Trickster that winds throughout this story.
The first exhibitions were at the closed conference divided between multiple speakers, meetings of members, and similar occasions. But came the speeches. Little squares of small countries, then respectable tourist towns (among them, the most dear to Vitaliano Brancati), and finally the great Realpolia curializzata and its major square, presided and strangled between chiesone and town hall, all sicaniana eminences of Baroque architecture. And on all occasions Paul could visually see that the era of crowds seizures was really over for good. Television had engulfed the speeches of the past. Not only that, but the rite was almost the only party ticket, had a few outsiders: observers of the competition, spectators 'neutral', friends and relatives. And little else. Former high school students where they lived their presence thicken a bit 'listening. But it was always a few, rare to come in hundreds. A disappointment? In a sense, yes. But it was in play. To compensate, however, intervened in the local television and newspaper interviews with their regional and provincial popular with their services, including photo and mini-biographies. He felt well do something that had always refused to do: to commemorate the Resistance. If the stubborn refusal of long before it was motivated by the recalcitrance of the rhetoric mythicized, almost obligatory in that sort of ritual, the acceptance of that time was clarified by the need to counter the trend of Holocaust denial or layer between the opposing sides of the historical scenario: A product of the "new times", which was spreading with hairy ideo-political malice. Maybe out of context with investigations of civilian casualties of the partisan struggle and the internal rivalries of those armed groups opposed: a job which seemed to specialize in a prominent journalist of the moderate left, deputy editor of a popular weekly magazine. With drastic consequences on your career, stop by internal hostility to his group. Among the guests were scandalized reagents of the same "family" the most hostile surprise was an old man of fierce warrior spirit, viscerally linked to the Resistance, "place" of their ideo-political redemption. You will understand that I'm talking about Giorgio Bocca.
He confessed, Paul, since the first conference that he would not use the political jargon: its host mentor and was very glad to be relieved of that obligation questionable. And in the newspeak including tedious repetition of the usual big rallies and small politicians: he invented new incipit and thematic sequences for every occasion, without letting the inevitable jam fixity of individual dominant themes. Not only is every topic could be presented within a different perspective from time to time, but the same was likely to comitial their sequence variations ad infinitum, and also differ in the sequence of the major conceptual content and its location oratory. It is worth mentioning that this adventure could enjoy the help of his son, which suggested topics and wrote memos. For example, the attack on Article 18 Contract workers: flagship, the refusal of the Radical Party. Which was represented in his college, by a former student of his good high school gymnasium realpoliese: find funny professor and former student committed to the dispute during the interview candidates to an authoritative tevelevisione liotriese. * From the notes
inherited from my friend it is easy to suppose that he mattered to transfer one or more stories in their own experience of the candidate-speaker: The human encounters, knowledge of interest (both positive and negative), the personal vanity of certain "comrades", the jealousies and rivalries between clubs and sections of the same sub-district and inter-provincial: he had collected material, Paul, in his notebooks. It would certainly have made juicy stories, Pathos and Cronos if they had not decided on the sudden (and brutal) to stop his stay in the shadows of Plato's Cave. Here, at least, a note of the time of his agenda: a confession to his surety, the wonder that Gates had aroused in him the rivalries mentioned above. "I imagined teams of young 'hard-core': vanity so much as suspect?" The neo-friend and assured him, "are small ripples. There are the hard and pure, and most of our guys." Maybe, he thought, and said Paul. The particularly
narratable, the irritation that he had accepted his application within the various circles of the party: from the choice had not been digested by those young people, and especially by Capetti already touched by the grace of an election to the board of this or that town, or even the liotrica Province: the party had had, and yet had, provincial councilors. The contemporary application of Paul's was a lion high school mate of his son. Difficult character. When Paul had a hint of uneasiness, he asked his sponsor if he had discussed with Mr clubs and local elected representatives to the proposal of his candidacy. Gates assured that yes, of course, had spoken and had convinced all the little local leaders. Paul was a different version by a former student at the high school realpoliese, Secretary-section of a circle hinterland subetneo: Congressman Gates, acting, too, of the provincial party secretary, had decided all by himself. Or more precisely, having consulted the young Akiskene on the figure and the charisma of the professor Tasting, incassatone prsentazione the best possible, had not considered it necessary to talk to other students in the district. For what? It was not him, across the vast province liotrica, the most influential of the revolutionary people? So, we let him go. Paul was a situation comedy loosely at the bottom (did not know, maybe?) Is reproduced everywhere from joining together in collective bipedal speakers of both sexes to think harangue decide issues of any kind, but with more passionate office where political issues are: very nice sounding words and chatter about the wonders of democracy (permanent dialogue, free unbiased evaluation and criticism, majority decisions, etc.) and, in rebus, omissions, deviations from sacred paths and horns made against the sacred values \u200b\u200bof paper and voice. Of course, the former student, now in middle school secretary of his country, reassured his companions on the qualities of his former teacher: "The character, nothing to say. Indeed, all to admire. Tranquilli, then." Intervention healthy, which calmed the troubled waters of the lake provincial revolutionary.
As for Gates, deputy revolutionary for the second Once the national parliament and provincial secretary long career, with his reckless conduct ducetto (and a fellow patron of the macula with some accounts), they dug the pit politics. After the defeat in the avalanche Kaimana, the provincial congress thanked Mr, accepted the resignation rituals and put on trial. Conclusion natural avalanche appointment of a new secretary. He had worked too mate secretary and Mr, which rests so. A tragedy? No, not a drama, only a burning: It is nice seeing shelved. But from then on she would perform the job of professor of philosophy. The board, with two terms of assets, was well secured to his distant future. Of course, the militancy was not under discussion: Gates remained in the Party, available at the collective work, and so on. And, of course, in dreaming pending possible re-entry into the "nerve center".
Details. The defeat (discounted) of the small International Revolutionary Party is not clouded by the fact that the objective planned by the "litterer" (a term not mine) of the candidacy of Paul was fully reached: the votes taken by the party in his college (very large) were almost twice before. And in towns and villages who knew him as a professor surpassed even doubling. Of this success was acknowledged that young people had suggested the candidate Pauline. The satisfaction of the gate.
surprisingly unaware of the complicated practice that accompanies the submission of applications (as many signatures on the right and left, how many authorities involved!), So Paul was unaware of the obligation to notify an authority panormitana expenses incurred for the campaign and claim a refund. Not having been duly informed by his sponsor, touched to receive this letter snarling Pepper:
Panormo Court of Appeals. / Electoral College Regional Guarantee / Prot 13 / 015. / / The President
the deliberation of the Board of Election Coverage on October 18, 2001; view of the art. 15, Section 8 of the Law of 10 December 1993, n.515;
NOTICE Try
Mr. Paul
No on 05/02/1932, Realpolia, residing at Via Romana, 102, Akiskene, candidate in the elections of May 13, 2001, to file the statement referred to in Article 2, first paragraph, of Law No. 3 July 5, 1982, n.441, which must be accompanied by the statement of contributions and services received and expenses incurred (Article 7 paragraph 6 n.515/93 law) within fifteen days of notification of this warning.
Panormo
October 19, 2001 The president of the regional electoral guarantees. President of the Court, Carlo Rotolo. / Signature [synthetic doodle].
It was over here! Not at all. The implication of the paper with the above content transcribed, this header:
"Court of Liotrivi. Realpolia sub-offices. Office Notifications Protests Executions" as required in
acts, the undersigned Assistant UNEP, Attaché Office in the epigraph, I certify that he had been notified and given copies of above the target set out herein, in their own homes, by their legal knowledge and science, delivered as follows: Try to Mr. Paul
, Via Romana, 102, Akiskene, in the hands of his wife, cas [aling], conv [ivente] [more other illegible]
Akiskene, 02. 11.
2001 The Judicial Officer, Dr.
. Sebastiana Branco
Court of Liotrivi
separate section Realpolia
Upon receipt of the pompous wary Paul presented it to Gates to receive light and comfort. The absent-minded fellow honorable, that he had forgotten to explain the inexperienced candidate for this part of the grim "joyous war machine" greeted with alarm smiling nonchalance. And he took the honor of writing the answer. A second appointment under the wheels of an old castle extensive history of the land and sea was enough to lift Paul dall'impiccio of writing. But not the other, with much of the shipment receipt. Here is the text-response
"The Electoral College Regional Guarantee / At the Court of Appeal of Palermo
Subject: Statement of expenditure incurred and bonds taken. (Article 2, first paragraph number 3, Act July 5, 1982, n.441)
Try Paul I, the undersigned, born in Realpolia (Lt) on 02.05.1932, resident in Via Romana Akiskene n.72 , candidate for the Senate-Sicania, college 14 - the list of International Revolutionary Party
declare not to have incurred any expense for the election campaign for the election of the Senate of May 13, 2001.
On my honor I affirm that the statement is true.
Liotrivi, November 8, 2001 The candidate
Paul
* Try
missing in the text, "Vaffa ...!" that Paul could not write in such text vibrato. We laughed together cosiffatta of rigamarole. In our beautiful country has not even bosses to impose a saving of money to the generous state without incurring wasteful squandering of time and hassle. But beyond all decency is what the "title" of communication, that NOTICE-printing all uppercase screaming in the middle of the page bristling with figures and references burocratofili.
Paul, in fact, some spesuccia had sustained. He had had printed by a friend with the equipment needed a brochure that explains "The reason for a candidate" (the title of the rash political, ethical and even political). One hundred copies were distributed in the circles of the PRI in the area. Spending was limited to a free offer, which was of 200,000 pounds of old. Then he paid for gasoline for travel and personal pase a square next to the speeches. He gave 25 copies of his latest book of poems to the children of the circle akiskenico because it proceeds by selling them, some sum. And small amounts, around 50,000 they said sometimes directly to those guys always in difficulties. His son, then "buy" a membership card to the party paying 100,000 pounds. But the campaign posters and prints the names of the candidates gave them to him without any burden to the party candidates. Yet he left a certain freedom for writing text: those of Paul brought in front of literary quotations: a thought of a couple Orazio Leopardi crowned with one of the last poster. The Horatian suggested, in vain, as it does now: "There is a limit to profit." The more the text citazioini included in the brochure. Which opens with a provocative counterpoint already in the quotations under the title: a sort of paradox snooty Manlio Sgalambro from the book, "indifference with regard to society," and a long piece of Leopardi running collision with the arrogance (Zibaldone, February 17, 1821). And here's some highlights of paragraphs: "1. The human sacrifice", 2. "The market god." 3. "World hunger. That does not stop the massacre of the innocents." 4. "Counterpoint: Croesus the Christians." 5. "Environmental degradation". 7. Caimaneide. In other words: bulimia of a superior, 7.1. "Such memorable. "7.2." Be even more memorable. "7.3." Hedonism caimanesco. "9." A defense of the defenseless "
* Among the notes of Paul there are various quotes from various written texts and authors, with marginal notes" of jet ", ranging from small volumes as" The cultural revolution day by day "to those printed by Editoriale 's" Express "for his thirty years of life and success:" 30 years of Foreign Affairs, "(2 vols, in edited by Antonio Gambino), "30 years of costume" (2 vols. c. Umberto Eco) "30 years of scandals" (c. Giampaolo Pansa), "30 years of plots" (c. Giorgio Bocca), "30 years of terrorism" (a fork of E. c.), and so on. Even the "Poems" by Mao Tse-tung (Then they wrote it), introduced by Franco Fortini, Tsang commented by Keh-Chia, translated by Franco De Poli (with precise and illuminating historical and cultural notes) for editions red Samona and Savelli. Another volume and Savelli Samona weblog is read and annotated by Paul: "Reformists and revolutionaries in the French May". A few title: "The walls of Paris' collection 'Books against' No.4, Marsilio. Among the other books read in whole or in part (not always supervening death he was vice-passion to read several books at once), suppliers of the passages quoted, are: Francois Ponchaud, "Cambodia Year Zero," Sonzogno, 1977: dramatic presentation of Cambodia released by the Khmer Rouge. Finally, two other titles relevant: G. Cipriani, G. De Lutiis, A. Giannuli, "Italy and the mysteries of the murder. Secret Service. After the war in Florence (May 1993). The full text of the decision of the judge Felice Casson of 'Gladio'," the magazine publisher "Incidents" (Paul bought regularly). Unit A book contains an interview with Luciano Violante Giuseppe Calderoni, entitled, "The Corleonesi. Mafia system and subversive", July 1993.
* One of these textual citations sounds quite strange. Strana to the source, an author and a book away from its cultural climates. But since our friend does nothing (even if the case is needed, and often with gratitude), a sense in this quotation must be there. We (pluralis modestiae) we believe we have found it: let the reader Duemilatrenta the sting of the fun and find it themselves alone, if our assumptions do not convince. Here's the quote.
"It may seem strange that in these matters Braquemart would oppose Forestaro, although there were very similar in their thinking and their actions. However, it is a mistake which s'incorre frequently to infer from the similarity of means also a similarity the end, and believe to be equally inspiring desire in both cases. There was diversity in the context of both, as the old people craved the wild marine exhibitions, while Braquemart believed the land to slaves. It was in fact one of the various internal conflicts of the Mauretania, which does not need to explain here in all its aspects. Suffice it to mention that between the savage anarchy and nihilism defined there is a deep contrast, and in such a struggle we have to decide if the populous shores of humans should be done instead of a desert or renew the life of the primitive forest. All the characters of late being defined nihilism of Braquemart. It had its own intelligence eradicated the cold and prone to utopia, life seemed, as always in this kind of people, such as a clockwork, and he saw the violence and terror-wheel drive Of this watch. "
ERNST Junger, "On cliffs of marble ", published by Bloomsbury Publishing," The Phoenicians Pocket "
* And here is our (easy) hermeneutics. How to interpret these quotes from an author a little similar to the verb" left "(despite his famous essay on" Work ") ? It found that comparability, Paul, one of the protagonists of that novel hyper-negative and allegorical (in an anti-Nazi) and the opposing side to his arruffapopolo? Neither the Kaiman nor his acolytes accomplices faithful servants and allies were well-fed butcher to run mastiffs, bristling with sharp metal sbranante onslaught of enemies, like the Forestaro or Braquemart, nor would a fertile area of \u200b\u200bdesertified or incorporate the wild forest. However, Paul suggests, their action is comparably less destructive: bodies were not intended to massacres, tortures, but to laws and democratic institutions. Their mastiffs were small metallic men planned to give him a heterogeneous mass (thought) decadent, that is ignorant of the actual concrete rules of living: more thoughtful, even if somewhere improvable; magistrates with the ambition to do true justice even courageous against organized crime and corrupt politics, honest businessmen who would not want to be gangsters or extortion, or by way of electing councilors and ministers, and poor old sick and disadvantaged in general, eager for a real minimal attention to their problems and suffering. There were massacres and the wingmen and compatible referents kaimanesimo allies (including a party chief Tramontano, nearest him, yes, a real bulldog than a political finished): avvocatoni and avvocaticchi, economists dwarfs & Body head of curly grama accountants virility and scathing eloquence, managers believe that "you have to live with the Mafia" (twisted succulent business), and other "Good" incarnate. Brancaleone army turned into the winning army kaimaneschi billion, brought to Parliament to make laws on a personal basis and to deny the facts and evidence of testing are tested in defense of the great sower of Cape ruins and his cronies rescued from rubbish bins or cleared of marginalism defeated.
All events that Paul feared and denounced as a realistic possibility in his speeches and conferences. And in interviews televisve and the island's largest daily, Sicania Gazette, published in the capital of Sicilian, but with editorial offices in major cities. The latter had invited him in his writing Liotrivi, where a pretty girl had been photographed and interviewed for a local service for the submission of candidates to Parliament in gestation. He came out a good job, and the picture was not bad. Finally Paul, the lone scholar and popular provincial, confined mostly in the school world, he felt the attention of major media and those boundaries crossed by a public man. The agitated even see his name printed on many campaign posters and lists of candidates: the walls of the centers of the vast constituency of those posters were plastered. Vanitas vanitatum ...? Sure. But that bit of excitement he found it rewarding presenteeism as a kind of completion of its virile maturity. *
Paul fell ill with cancer. Was operated on, and seemed to have arrived in time to avert the worst. Shortened gut fat a foot, a biopsy had ruled out infiltration and metastasis risk. The first two years did not reveal the controls of the rite, no unpleasant news. The third rose an unexpected stain of the rectum suspicious nature of metastasis. The new project was presented with snout unbearably ironic: they were afraid of having to remove the entire tract, blocking the patency fecal replacement removed the infamous funnel side, finally, last but not least, the chemotherapy. Paul reminded his maternal grandmother, who died of her disease in the infamous 1940 (painfully long - pointed out - to save themselves from the coming horrors of the Second World War. But this, So what? The usual crash, she thought, to the associative digression!) . He took a few days to reflect, he recalled decided mused, letting two weeks. During which silent novelty with Susanna, intensified the movement pleasure-dragging her into a whirlwind of travel shows stay. Finally, it announced its decision "within the medical gentlemen," but in reality to his former pupil, author of the first action: correct, timely, conspicuous, but unfortunately not enough to save him from the monster. He rejected the "battle surgical" and accepted only the experience of chemotherapy, if the histological biopsy sample revealed he had, it was almost certain, the malignant nature. After another week of submission of the report of the Institute of Pathology University Hospital, the same who had restored calm after the "first mutilation". And when he came the response awaited with fear and trembling, that was not the first time: a carcinoma only was unmistakable, but it was more "intramucosal" and superficial, but already infiltrated a few millimeters and aggressive fighting spirit. Conclusion, remove, immediately cut and throw to the dogs, remove and replace. In short, the devastation is feared that in these cases. Paul confirmed the decision: refusal obscene manipulation, the chemo to test tolerability, pending the outcome of philosophical despair but hopefully inevitable. The seventy Socrates had refused an easy solution just to avoid the embarrassment of chasing a residual life of wandering, and he would not have been able to deny with a bit of stoicism for once actually applied, to prevent the massacre despicable equivalent remnant of residual life-deprived, "and therefore equally shameful?
The former pupil had the good taste not to bore him with the postulations of his religious faith, for he child lost his father, had been reshaped in the factory of "brain lost," which is a religious seminary, and there was no to pierce the shell of isolation from reality: neither the passion nor his word with the frightening experience of her unique craft cutter and ricucitore bodies invaded daily by the supreme demonstration of the inexistence of his legendary gud. But he knew that his former professor was not an improviser's emotional "total rejection", but a strong and long career of radical meditation decades. After months of silence
other print (such as joking with some family members and relatives) Susanna Paul had to stay with the custody of the secret increasingly erosive. She did not need to mystify the tears that flowed to the advertiser. And they continued to rain on his lap when he was only more than in front of him. Paul could not suffer more than the outpouring of the first phase of the damn chemo. Since the first injection he knew that torture was an acceptable rate of break down that feeling inside: a guinea pig for what purpose? ? repeated to Susanna. A seventy-three, was to prolong the life of a few years to accommodate such havoc? Flatly refused to go: how can it go or should go, judgments. Susan, at first, tried to get him to "change your mind", but he retorted, smiling, that his choice was not an 'idea'. No? And as he called it, he? Traccheggiava Susanna, was at the game, that kind of competition side: demand, goals, seek remedies against bad luck. At its mainly. But did not insist too much, given the firmness of that decision (which he called visceral). She resigned herself to hope no guarantees. There were family members who were praying for him. Perhaps the son, but unconvinced. Not even his daughter was very convinced, he knew how he thought his father and was not blind to the point where he's wrong. The world was horrible, as he noted, and she was anxious bride who had not wanted to "give birth to other candidates to unhappiness." Stubborn to give up (he had complained Rina, a long time) had shown even the accusation of selfishness, but his choice did not know doubts. * You
crying around that old obstinate, and prayed. The two movements from The couples are usually in close proximity to death. But do not we all? ? Paul smiled, taking a few furtive tear in this or that "loved one". Sorry especially for the grandchildren: they would like to follow them for a few years. Sometimes, almost stunned, came to doubt the inevitability looming: after all, were known cases of spontaneous remission of evil. A sensational case had been shown, many years before, by prof. Regit, in the classroom of the pathological anatomy of the faculty of medicine liotriana (Paul hung around there, with occasional appearances, mediated by the coat of a friend who authorized him to use it when it was all him). It was a classic case of exploitation of religion: a man "worked" for colon cancer and repaired without unnecessary mutilation revealed by a large metastasis, which heal itself. The light does not believe in miracles, and confined itself to expose the case with a mild comment on the mysterious resources of organic matter and their relative unpredictability. It could not be his case? But he laughed, Then, he failure of these children to the easy consolation of (say) "impossible hope".
For a time Paul endured the pangs of evil, resist, enjoy the grandchildren, helping those who could read, write, send a few more political article in the local newspaper and periodical political and cultural capital required of this ticket? So be it. But when evil attacks became more frequent and less bearable decided to close the game. He had accumulated a lot of sleeping tablets and anti-anxiety for this possibility: that would be enough to clean solution?
Not so long ago had considered the possibility of a sortie sensational: a former student had committed suicide by throwing himself from the fourth floor. He did not, judging by the "visible" no good reason for doing so: medical specialist, winner of a contest for a comfortable place in the 'Hospital "nearest to his country, just thirty-five, cuts short his life with that gesture striking . Other particularly notable: after collecting the necessary documentation to enter service. Virtually on the eve of his professional start. Only sign of disturbance in its physiology, introverted temperament, resulting in hypersensitivity, some dumb sometimes darkly fraught with hidden thoughts. The case had rocked the city, improved the psychological breakdown of the parents, a deep mark engraved in the memory of Paul. Who ruminated: why not follow that his unfortunate pupil, if necessary? But slowly the time had acquired the preferred solution, because that impose additional pain to his daughter, so fragile and so loved? And let this other negative legacy to his son, who was also not so strongly in its neurons (in spite of training)? Going out in silence, was, if necessary. Ensure that the 'advance' disappeared into the possibility of a fit handed disease: a collapse in natural, foreseeable end, the economy of the evil I do not forgive.
But it was then so easy to escape to a diagnosis of self-poisoning? Had, perhaps, convenience interest in not rocking the water, not to spread doubt about the proximate causes of the inevitable dismissal. His thoughtful concern, however, were put out by a lightning stroke. Unexpectedly, it was said, but in my recollection in the wake of the event, Paul was far away from thinking of a possible heart attack for sure, "Valenti" (yes, he joked, as appropriate, at this level ). When cancer touched the topic, he said that he hoped in his heart: a good squeeze and go. Mica defended him from the pacemaker that easy outcome. And the children of angina pectoris did not fail to revive the hope in his moments blacks.
* There's also some complications his death. He had left the precise requirements, assigned to the undersigned and made known even to Susanna in duplicate word processor. No religious funeral, only civil ceremony at the cemetery and transfer. In recent times, was convinced that was not worth creating further discomfort to the children by insisting on cremation: still not practicing in the nearby capital of the province, would have had to ask the competent agency of the regional capital, with red tape and costs was not appropriate to impose the heirs. Moreover, it was a boon for the local priests, none of whom was unaware of "his ideas" as they would behave? What would they decide to do? It would be consulted with the Bishop's Curia Realpolia? In the last days of resistance, if Paul would ask his will deprived of embarrassment even his children and their spouses, not just the priests. But he was concerned that the thing might not be able to appreciate some of the Curia marpione or parish, a religious funeral, maybe preceded by some brief visit in pure friendship to the sick, he could not sit the final solution of the "beautiful immortal, beneficial" Manzoni's memory? It could not be used as an index of conversion in extremis, functional (and not just because of the character, well known in the vast territory of the multi-city high school-catchment school gymnasium) to the holy cause of Ecclesia triunfans? He wrote, Paul, also his epitaph. It sounded so simple to you: "One day he fell ill of Truth / hard and served with fidelity. / But he paid with his serenity." The three hendecasyllables trunks were carved in marble on the roof of his modest family tomb.
* After the party ... But here, who was lu Santu gabbatu, if not the poor Susan? Yet once again, "widow". And now almost as old, certainly not in the mood for more adventures. Perhaps if I had not been (almost) happily married father of two daughters regularly get married mothers and apprehensive, and grandfather (almost) happy to scale to four grandchildren (two boys and girls, to his daughter), three to twelve years, I would (again, perhaps) proposed to Susan (after all, the signs of the ancient splendor residues sufficed to console an elderly person - to use the euphemism ipocritello - like myself) to keep her company for its stable to ours, the rest of life. I was not the natural heir of Paul Taste? Susanna Instead, after several weeks of delay, "assisted" by the sons of Paul, he returned, alone, in the capital (and the Republic of cheating, "he thought, and said, Susan, Paul and recalling his own experience). With his resignation, his poverty, his gray hair and disguised pressing, between family life and little interested in his fate. Except for her two daughters, even in a relationship never completely smooth (it is hoped, be improved by the deterioration of the mother). The biggest of which almost certainly would have given more problems with its painful past each other, the wound never really healed, and the fallout in the dark evil of depression anorexic. But I am sure that the two creatures, which, after all, she has sacrificed much of its troubled existence, will not even miss some material aid, in addition to the miserable social pension that is still waiting. He promised not to forget our long acquaintance and fledgling friendship is not reflected, perhaps I will still hear from him. One last thing, of no importance, but significant in the economy of private personnel. Even Anna, My wife said the story in the words of Rina, the (how strange to write the word) late wife of Paul: Susanna, beautiful and unfortunate. *
Di Paolo, I'll have to take it again (his deity Cronus permitting) or that has not left me, the greedy or wasteful, half chest (chest he says) with paper (so, with the usual, a little 'modest , coquetry, called them)? Agendas diary, letters of famous people without merit and deservedly illustrious, literature and thought (writers, philosophers, sociologists ...) and gift-books of some of them with more or less flattering dedications (a couple of these, instead of letters "Prohibited" by health problems) unpublished cultural and political essays, articles, sketches, notes, notes of costume. And, in the large body of Agenda diarizzate, quotes educated, often lengthy, from very varied reading: for some years, placed on top of the page, as epigraphs to his thought-chronicles ... It is a kind of critical overview indirect branched in various directions and themes. Makes them what they want, or you can - I said and repeated meetings in recent days. We'll see. But the forces, the forces!
Already, the forces declining: like a tired sun at sunset. But even though I can not confine the active devotion to my great friend and brother. There are many good books to read, to someone yesterday and today, and a lot 'to read classics. Now, for example, I'm sipping the "brilliant book, brave and terrifying" (Arundhati Roy), which is titled "Shock Economy". I find the Naomi Klein's "No Logo" ("international bestseller, translated into 28 languages), the fearless investigator of evil in the world wrong, or criminalizing globalized capitalism, which I had learned to appreciate the pages of the weekly L'Espresso "to which I was subscribed for decades. And since my friend died I was infected with the mania of his diary quotes, I also began to write passages of the books I read. From this I moved pieces of the Introduction, but also its title ("The charm of the tabula rasa. Past three decades to erase and remake the world ") and the exergue of the Bible, which is a slap in the face: the truth and the joint ethical sensitivity. Here it is: the earth was corrupt before God and filled with violence. God looked upon the earth, and behold it was corrupt, for all flesh had corrupted its ways on earth. Then God said to Noah: "It 's coming for me the end of all flesh, for the land, because of them, is full of violence here destroy them with the earth "(Genesis, 6, 11).
In agreement with these delicacies, a passage of text by Naomi reads:" The news that day was making the rounds of the reception center was that Richard Baker , a prominent Republican member of Congress and their coincittadino, told a group of lobbyists: 'We were finally able to cleanse the system of public housing in New Orleans. We did not know how, but God has done for us'. Joseph Canizaro, one of the richest manufacturers in New Orleans, had recently expressed similar sentiments: 'I think we face a blank slate from which to start. And thanks to this tabula rasa we face great opportunities'. All that week the Louisiana State Legislature in Baton Rouge was crawling with corporate lobbyists intent to make those big opportunities: lower taxes, fewer regulations, cheaper labor and 'a smaller, safer city' - that in practice was worth to say razing public housing and replace them with condominiums. To hear all the talk about 'new beginnings' and 'tabula rasa', the risk of forgetting the toxic soup of rubble, chemical waste and human remains that are just a few miles of highway -
* Ps
Latest from Susanna (in month and year of the Asian Tsunami: over 220,000 dead): the youngest daughter, is pregnant. remained until recently, and fearful, now accepted the challenge, the risk, the uncertainties of motherhood. Here's another hook vital to Susanna. That's hard to hear but one of her breasts and refuses to see the doctor: I've been cut too, he says. What inconsistency: the daughter "heals", he makes a granddaughter, and she gives up? I do not believe. My word I will add more to persuasion of his daughters. We hope to convince her.
END
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